So I was walking down King street, Hammersmith in West London, one day recently and as I walked past the bank I noticed something didn’t seem right. I looked at the wall at the side of the entrance and noticed that there were new red bricks in a certain part of the wall but the rest of the building was covered in old bricks. For a moment or two I wondered why this wall had these red bricks in it whilst the rest was covered in old bricks.
Aha, it came to me the hole in the wall cash machine had been taken away and the red bricks were now living where the machine used to reside. My mind started to race and it quickly dawned on me that that cash machine had been there as long as I can remember. I got to thinking that lately everything in the local area is changing, nothing is staying the same. Memories and nostalgia started to fill my mind of the cash machine that I used to walk past everyday to get to school in the early eighties.
I remembered when I was seven years old, my mum withdrawing one hundred pounds from the hole in the wall and me repeatedly saying ‘wow! You’re rich!’ and my mum saying ‘believe me, 100 pounds does not make you rich’.
I also remembered walking home from school with my sister’s and a classmate one day and seeing Rodney from Only fools and horses by the machine. He was very friendly to us as I recall and so tall I thought he could touch the sky.
All this reminiscing……. and over a Barclays cash machine. My thoughts bubbled to the surface and resulted in the conclusion that How could a cash machine that doesn’t talk or move or do anything but dispense money to people generate such long lasting memories?
I went to reach for my phone so I could record a video and I planned to say something along the lines of, everything changes and nothing stays the same, referencing the now defunct cash dispenser. But I stopped short as my mind kept going back to the thought and question of How was a cash machine able to produce such memories? The phone stayed in my pocket but the questions still ran through my mind.
If a machine can make memories, what memories are we able to create? What legacy do we want to leave behind? Are some of us prepared to stand stationary and silent like the wall, willing to let life pass us by? Or will we live life everyday giving and creating beautiful memories?
What memories will you create? How will you be remembered?
By the way it wasn’t all doom and gloom for the cash machine. I observed at a later date, that it had been given a new home around the other side.
In December 2016, Andy Murray, or should I say Sir Andy Murray was triumphant in landing the coveted BBC Sports Personality of the year award. He beat an all-star cast, including my personal favourite boxer Anthony Joshua, whom I don’t even think was nominated. Outrageous if you ask me, But anyway.
Andy walked away from the ceremony with the trophy and all the plaudits and rightly so, his win was voted for by the general public. But for me there was someone who deserved just as much recognition for Andy’s success-His coach Ivan Lendl. But like most coaches, Ivan stayed out of the limelight and remained in the background, happy for his protégé to take the acclaim.
But a closer look at Andy’s career and moreover his titles wins show just how much Ivan Lendl has contributed to Andy’s success.
In 2011 Andy hired former tennis player and legend Ivan Lendl as his coach. Andy quickly went on to reach the Australian Open final that year.
By 2012 Andy Murray was ruling tennis. That year he became the first brit in 77 years to win a grand slam when he won the US open and he also then took the 2012 London Olympics by storm by winning that crown too.
In 2013 he went on to do what I thought i would never see in my lifetime. He became the first British man since Fred Perry to win Wimbledon. Perry last Wimbledon win was in 1936 a full 77 years before Andy’s SW19 success.
In 2014 Murray and Lendl parted company after a trophy laden partnership. Murray then began being coached Amelie Mauresmo in the same year. She remained his coach for two years he and didn't win anything. Not a single bean. Nada.
She later criticised him in public about his on-court behaviour.
Now this is when things get interesting for me because a real coach of any kind would have sought to help their client manage that behaviour with no public putdowns. For instance look at the recent case between Diego Costa of Chelsea and his manager Antonio Conte.
For those not familiar with the story, Costa had a reputation as being very angry on the pitch but all that changed when Conte arrived. Costa is now much calmer on the pitch and is playing ten times better. Conte’s man management skills were tested again so soon after taming the beast when Diego was offered a mouth watering contract in China. The player appeared to be slipping from his positive behaviour into trouble but Conte sorted it all out within weeks and it is not even mentioned anymore. Though if not handled correctly Chelsea would probably not be on the verge of winning another premier league crown. And Conte did this with minimum fuss and no public outburst of his player who is far more aggressive than Andy.
What I am pointing out here is that despite how talented these players are they needed the RIGHT coach to help them with their so called demons (Both players have had numerous coaches over the years).
When working with a coach especially a life coach, it is so important for the coach and client to have rapport. But even more important is the coach’s understanding of his client. When the coach identifies the client’s weak spots he must be skilled in providing appropriate support whilst challenging in a productive way.
A good coach, working with a ‘volatile’ character such as Andy would look at the consequences of his behaviour and the impact on himself and others. Furthermore, they would look at Anger management work focusing on the effects that anger have on the body physically, mentally and emotionally and use visualisation to point out what could be achieved when anger doesn’t play a part.
I 100% believe that EVERYONE should have a life coach, all the successful people of our time have one such as Oprah Winfrey and Richard Branson. Having a coach enables you to move from where you are to where you what to be with the coach helping you to navigate your blind spots. But it is also important that the client and the coach are the right fit. by all means hire a coach to enhance your life BUT do your homework. Check out their testimonials, ensure you find out if they are qualified and they should also offer you a free call and consultation to make sure you get each other and you both have the required rapport. Finding the right coach will provide you with a life changing experience. So pick the right coach for YOU.
And what about Sir Murray….within two months of rejoining Ivan Lendl, Murray was picking up his second Wimbledon crown. He then became the first man to successfully defend his Olympics crown and became world Number one for the first time in his life and there was not a Mauresmo in sight. Surely not a coincidence…..a classic case of good and bad coaching,
My name is Damian Duguid and I am a confidence mindset coach. I work with kind hearted and warm individuals who are ready make a change in their lives. I work with people who want to be uplifted, live from the heart and soul and unleash their inner confidence.
Contact me for a free chat on www.damianduguid.com
Why don’t we talk to each other anymore? I mean REALLY talk to each other. What ever happened to the art of conversation? You know, When you talked and someone really listened and vice versa.
Let’s look at the phone for instance. There was a time when the telephone was the ultimate way to communicate when you couldn’t do it face-to-face.
Before the days of snapchat, viber, watsapp, text messaging(messenger), facebook, twitter, periscope,instagram and all the other communication mediums we use today we used the good old house telephone to communicate.
‘It’s good to talk’ was a slogan BT, used in an ad campaign back in the day (oh how long ago that day seems now) and oh how true it was back then. Talking on the phone was a highlight, a priviledge, something to behold, a memorable experience. Not like now when you can’t gurantee you will even have the other person’s full attention and even if you do manage to hold their attention span before you know you are likely to be told by the other person that they have to go due to this fast paced, all action, never have time for anything or anyone life style we all seem to have signed for without ever reading the small print.
Back then a conversation on the phone was an experience. You organised what time you would ring the person and then you made it an important part of your plans, just as important say if you had a appointment for parents evening, a dentist appointment, a job interview, a……..(you get the drift). It was diary entry important. If you were the one to receive a phone call you made sure you were home at the agreed time to ensure you were there when the phonecall came in. Again it was diary entry important
The housephone was such an important part of the family that everyone in the house paid attention when the phone rang. BRRR BRRR……….. ‘I’ll get it’ the nearest person to the phone would cry whilst everyone else paused whatever they were doing to find out if the call was for them
A phone call was about sharing thoughts, feelings, finding out how someone was really doing or informing someone about news or relevant information. You really had to listen to the other person and they to you. It was the ultimate way to communicate and you couldn’t take it for granted because a lot of the time you had to arrange a mutual time you would both be available.
In those days people really wanted to talk, not like now when the receiver will only be interested usually if its to their benefit as opposed to having a nice chat and a laugh for no apparent reason.
People of a certain age will remember the embarrassment felt when you received a phonecall from a sweetheart and whilst trying to sound all cool and romantic to your beau, you were also fully aware that no one was paying attention to the TV but to your conversation . you feel the collective pregnant pause in the air and then you carried on Speaking on the phone while the rest of the family listen to what you’re saying.
Going to the phone box to talk in private was another classic time of life. First having to wait to for the box to be free. Then making sure you had the right change and finally making sure you said what you needed to say before the money ran out and the pips sounded.
In this day and age of technological advancement this might all sound like a glorious inconvience to some and it probably was but the build up required to take a phone call whether in private or at home meant that you truly appreciated a phone call and the caller. You gave each other your full attention because there was no other to communicate that quick. Unlike now where you can ring someone and they are trying to discipline children, cook dinner and/or finding something decent to watch on TV.
As a life coach the phone means so much to me. It is a chance for me to really listen deeply to my clients and to really take time to see the world from their point of view. That way I am able to provide clarity and purpose in order for them to raise their awareness and feel truly empowered.
But now we are living in a world where people have forgotten the true art of communication. The beauty of talking.
If you ring someone they don't answer their phone, but if you txt them they reply in seconds.
We don't talk face to face anymore, but will answer a fb comment in seconds.
You can call someone to arrange details about something, but they only want to watsapp their thoughts.
Nowadays when you try and hold a decent conversation with some people, all you get is the other persons face stuck in their phone.
Yes we need these mediums to help life along but we shouldn't be relying on them to communicate
Just for today let's communicate naturally.
phone someone and have a real conversation not just phoning someone because you need something.......
The need to Chatter really does matter
If you are interested in a free chat contact me for a free coaching call 07415 150 544
Or email me on damianduguid.com also available at www.damianduguid.com